Only the Lonely – The Art of Balancing Business and Love

Only the Lonely – The Art of Balancing Business and Love

Some may say that entrepreneurs are a special species. I admit, we are a little different than the average individual and sometimes it can feel as if we’re alone in the eyes of the world. Some of the characteristics we have are not ones that the average person would want to possess. After thinking about this a bit, I realized that we are in fact some very unique individuals and there are many out there who would not dare tap into the risky opportunities that many of us have dove into.

Being in a relationship with an entrepreneur can seem difficult for some and I have to say that I feel very grateful to have a spouse who possesses entrepreneurial characteristics just as I do.  There are many characteristics of an entrepreneur that have even been known to cause problems in relationships. I recently read a list of some of the common complaints from the partners of entrepreneurs and some of the issues they faced in their relationships included the following:

It can seem that they can be so focused at times where it may seem that you often have to repeat yourself to get their attention.

  • They seem to speak of their work as if it was a little child in the development stage.
  • It often seems as if their work is never-ending and that they always feel that there’s room for some type of improvement.
  • They stay up late and sometimes into the early hours of the morning.

I must admit, we are a passionate group of people who can often appear to be misunderstood. Our lack of attention may seem to some like ignorance and our love for our work can at times be mistaken for obsession. Some of us have been so deeply involved with our work where it may have caused our spouse to feel neglected. Fortunately, I was blessed to marry someone who happened to possess some of the same entrepreneurial characteristics as me and there have been plenty of times when we spent long nights up together building our business. There have also been nights when one of us ended up going to bed alone while the other stayed up to work. As an entrepreneurial couple, we had to have an understanding and we came to an agreement to incorporate one on one time together to make up for those lonely nights in bed.

 

When in a relationship with an entrepreneur, it’s important to understand that you should never believe that your partner doesn’t care about you or that they don’t want love in their lives. It’s important to sit down and come to terms with the kind of relationship you will have with your entrepreneur partner and it’s also important to put some things into place so that there is a clear understanding of how the two of you will operate as a couple to keep the relationship happy and healthy.

 

Below are a few helpful tips to help keep things running smoothly in your relationship and to also remember to be mindful of as you go through life living with your entrepreneurial partner.

It Can Appear To Be Lonely At The Top And On The Way There

I don’t know in what episode of your partner’s entrepreneurial journey you first appeared, but if it’s not the pilot, I bet there are things you find difficult to comprehend. Becoming successful is a long-term goal that requires a lot of sacrifice. There are times that it may seem as if your spouse is a loner because he/she has learned how to build walls to protect them from outside interferences that can get in the way of accomplishing their goals. They can seem to distance themselves or some are only comfortable being around other like-minded individuals who share common entrepreneurial interest or goals. Some entrepreneurs may even find that as they rise to the top, the journey is one that few people are willing to take with them.

Marriage and Family Is Not to Be Taken for Granted
My husband and I are a couple in business together so we make it a point to go on regular dates and we even take lunch breaks together. We also take the time to plan getaways so that we can be sure to get some special one on one time together with absolutely NO discussion about work. With our kids, we plan family time separately and that is when we give our undivided attention solely to our kids. Yes, it’s a lot of work and planning, but this is what works for us and it allows us to spend quality time with each other and our kids which also ensures we keep a healthy work/life balance.

Revise Your Social Connections

The sad truth is that not all of your friends will be able to understand your schedule, or perhaps they won’t want to. Sometimes the most difficult part is making peace with the fact that you will have to put an end to some friendships, and some of those may be the oldest ones you have. There comes a point where you may realize that you have outgrown some of your friends where their goals in life are not equivalent to yours.

This is just another thing that will test your strength as an entrepreneur. However, keep in mind that the closing of one door always ends up allowing the opening of another door to take place. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve began to realize the importance of the quality of friendships versus the quantity.

Although your entrepreneurial partner puts in many hours, it’s important for you both to clearly communicate so that both parties are on the same page in the relationship. It’s important to take time to discuss not only your goals as a couple but also your individual goals with one another. It’s also important to address each other’s needs and to support one another. You are a team and communication is the key to making it work. You should always keep the lines of communication open with your partner and as an entrepreneur, it’s important to include your partner every step of the way. It will do miracles for your relationship and a benefit is that you’ll always have a fresh sincere opinion that will help you understand every situation better.

As Entrepreneurs, we must learn the importance of balancing business and our love life. Our presence and affection towards our spouse is necessary and is also important to our entire family. We can’t treat our household as a work task that gets checked off the list as it’s important to learn how to stay actively involved, engaged, and connected in order to create balance. It may appear to some that it becomes more lonely as we climb to the top, but in actuality, a better way of putting it is that we’ve finally realized that the end goal is the obtainment of a better quality of life overall.  The time comes when we realize that in order to grow successful in life, we have to lose the drama, be at peace with and within ourself, and refuse to allow interferences to get in our way.  Once an entrepreneur achieves these ideals, it can be the most rewarding feeling.  Not only for the entrepreneur but also to the entrepreneur’s partner.  My husband and I support one another in all that we do and when accomplishments are made, we celebrate together.  Mastering the art of balancing our business and  our love has benefited us greatly and that feeling of loneliness has no place in our lives because we’ve learned that when you focus on your priorities, there’s no room available for anything else.